Swinging is not for all married couples. They do believe that swinging is better than sneaking around corners and lying to the partner about an outside relationship. Most agree with the statement "I think if two people agree on sex other than with their partners, then swinging perhaps is for them". To most swingers sex is a recreation which also satisfies a bodily hunger.
As far as being asked why have you married if you're going to get into swinging. People have a lot more emotional aspects of life other than just sex. Sex is just one part of it. Couples have for many years invested in building a complete and total relationships.. Sex is just one facet of it and it's been exclusive where as all other relationships with other have not been exclusive.
You are able to talk to people dance with tem, with all these things then why can't you have sex with them ? It doesn't have anything to do with the exclusive relationship This is your choice and it's the total, exclusive relationship that you want to keep and want to have and you don't want to get rid of; yet. You do have needs to have sexual fulfillment that if you can't get from just one type of person then why not swing. One person can't satisfy all your needs, and you can't satisfy all of anybody else's needs.
Swingers systematically report that they find it very difficult to go to what they call "straight" parties where they end up playing the couples' game, flirtation games, and other kinds of games.
Most of them believe that at
swinging parties one does not have to play games, put up the couple front or flirt, one is able to get down to the basics of life and have sex with one another it is mutually desirable.